October 04, 2014

"There is no real ending. It's just the place where you stop the story." - Frank Herbert

So this post was on hold for a long time but when I actually started writing it I was  watching the last episode of One Tree Hill. Okay normal post resumes now...

Is it cheating that I'm writing a post about endings when I haven't actually finished the episode yet? Okay sorry I stopped and finished the episode, and just sat there, for a good solid minute. Just staring at the screen. You know that moment when you're sitting in the cinema and the final line of the movie is spoken. When the credits come up and the lights begin to turn back on. 
It's pretty similar to that moment when you're sitting on your bed at night and you read the last line and then turn the last page of the book. 
That's the feeling.
The feeling of something ending. 

Endings are such weird things, like something has a start and then you enjoy it or not enjoy it and then it just stops, it just ends. Sometimes endings are some of the worst things you will ever experience and sometimes they are the absolute best. As I write this post my mind can't help but wander back to my final week of High School which was one of the biggest endings I have ever experienced. I completed thirteen years of schooling and in many graduation week speeches the hours and minutes that we spent in school were said but I can't be bothered to google it (sorry), but the important thing is THAT IT ENDED. 

I no longer catch the bus to school and look out the window with my music in, pretending I'm filming a music video (don't judge me, you all do it). I no longer go into the office and swipe on and sit down at my first period classes. I don't say 'goodmorning everyone' to my homeroom when I walk in and I no longer get to sit down at lunch and recess and spend it with the most important people in my life. It's all ended. 

I know I should be thankful to have been fortunate enough to have these experiences and I should be thankful that I have met so many wonderful friends through my six years of High School and I know I should stop writing about High School ending but you know what? I miss my friends. I miss walking past our courtyard and being surrounded by everyone I know and love. I miss walking down the hallways and being able to smile at a million different faces. 
The thing I miss the most though is walking back to my locker with an arm wrapped around me and laughing my head off over something that happened. That's what I miss the most. 

But it's ended, it's all over. I don't get to walk down those halls with an arm wrapped around me. I don't get to sit down at my group and just observe (I'm a people watcher not a creep). 
Everyone always says it's see you later not goodbye but I think we're in denial, it's ended. 

It's another ending to add to the list and no matter how hard you fight or how hard you push, everything ends and all we are left with is the memories.



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